Sitting in the pew at church on a hot summer day, tears coming down my face, I breathe in the sentiment…
Worry less, live more, Steph.
I take another deep breath, surrounded by my family as we honor the loss of my great aunt, Auntie Nell. Nell was my grandmother’s sister. Both of these amazing ladies died at age 96; my grandmother in January of last year and Nell this summer.
As I stated in our last chat, Love is Everything, this summer was a summer focused on love. This loss was sandwiched in between the usual summer fun punctuating this theme of the Summer of 2018.
Auntie Nell’s son, Henry, read this beautiful poem at her funeral. It touched me so much that I knew at some point I would need to share it with you….
By Linda Ellis
I read of a man who stood to speak at a funeral of a friend. He referred to the dates of the tombstone from the beginning….to the end.
He noted that first came the date of birth and spoke of the following date with tears, but stated what mattered most was the dash between the years.
For that dash represents all the years they spent together on earth and now only those who loved them know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not how much we own, the cars…the house…the cash. What matters is how we lived, loved and how we spent our dash.
So think about this long and hard; are there things you’d like to change? For you never know how much time is left that still can be rearranged.
To be less quick to anger and to show appreciation more and love the people in our lives like we have never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile…remembering that this special dash may only last a while.
So when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash, would you be proud about the things they say about your dash?
Gives you the little tingles, right?!
Tears streamed down my face as Henry spoke about how his mother loved life and her family. Nell was much like my grandmother; they loved to dance, laugh and love.
After the tears stopped and I honored not only the passing of Auntie Nell but grieved the loss I feel every day of my grandmother’s passing, thoughts bubbled up to the surface.
To coin a song by Tim McGraw
Do I live like it I were dying?
Ooooo and here we go…those tears come back right here in the cafe as I watched that one….that song gets me everytime.
To answer the question I would have to say
NO, not necessarily.
Like most people, I spend way too much time ruminating on things that are outside of my control which include the past and future.
But it feels lovely to ponder what would life be like if we collectively worried less and lived more.
Worry less, Live More.
Sounds a bit pie in the sky but honestly it really isn’t. It just takes a whole lot more work than worrying does.
While integrating this poem and the losses, I was brought back to pondering how I am living; something that I rarely do when I am ruminating. What I found is that there are things I have told myself that I can’t have because I am not at “that place” yet. While focusing on the negative, I also get caught up in focusing on limited beliefs and fear.
I bet it does. I know I’m not that unique..
Turning that around has been a slow process. What happened after the loss was that I started focusing on how I was living in my apartment. What I found was that my surroundings had a flavor of my thoughts.
Clutter, clutter, clutter.
I started to throw out that which I didn’t love and what was not serving me. Old yoga clothes, out. New yoga tops, in. Glasses sitting in closets I will never use…bye, bye, bye. Cracked tea cups, gone. New fun teacups in. I continued this throughout the house. I can’t say that it hasn’t taken on a life of it’s own with being A BIT OCD…
BUT it has been…
Cleaning up my environment has helped in getting me to declutter my mind and vision. There is still work to be done in this area but I must say this is now what my yoga/meditation space looks like
And it has been inviting me to spend more time there which can only help:)
My focus has been on the question….
Do I love it?
It could be anything….do I love this piece of clothing, this cup, this book, this car, this blah blah blah. And if the answer is no then it has to go.
Keeping love at the forefront of my mind has helped me feel like I am integrating the lessons from The Dash and Auntie Nell’s passing.
If we all began to incorporate this question into our daily activities, we would be able to embrace more of what the meaning of life truly is. We can’t opt out of everything we don’t like; nor should we. But if we started to incorporate love into our decisions, we may find that we are more fulfilled with the life that we are living.
We may find that we are….
Worrying less and living more.
So who would you be if you worried less and lived more? What would that look like for you?
For me today, that looked like me coming to my fav cafe to site and have tea, eat some sweet potato fries and talk to you all rather than engaging in the life sucking process that has been me finding anew care and dealing with car salesmen! LOL.
As for the things that I tell myself I can’t have because I am not there yet, I have begun to call bullshit on that idea. There is no “there,” there is only right here, right now. And there is not better time than the present to all that life has to offer.
And that, my friends, has made all the difference!